Saturday, March 19, 2011

Here Today, Blog Tomorrow #19

What I would do if I were president...

Today, my wife and I had a funny conversation that I felt like sharing with all of you. First, I must tell you, that my wife has not only been the perfect friend but also my constant reader. I'm always looking to her for opinions, asking questions, bouncing ideas off of her. She not only listens but offers suggestions. But she also deals with the raw material that I work with. Every day I try to make her laugh at least once. So for every 20 times I made her laugh there were 4 or 5 failed jokes. But she's alright with it, she knows I'm experimenting on what to put in a book and what not to.

Sitting at the kitchen table I was sitting with her, drinking coffee. I then told her a funny little thought that popped into my mind.

"One day I want to be president."
"What?" she squints at me.
"Yeah, President of the United states."
"It wouldn't be for the reasons that you're thinking though. I'm sure different to do lists would pass my desk. A war, we'll get through it. A bill needs to be passed, I'll look it over. But what I really want, the whole reason I would persue this to set foot in that Presidential Kitchen..."

She starts to snicker.

"Seriously, wouldn't that be the greatest? Good evening mister president, please, partake and enjoy the First Burger. Would you like some First ceral. Perhaps a First T-bone steak with potatoes that will fill you for a day. Did we mention the juices of the meat cure cancer, emphysema, nausea, headache, inflamed appendix and lumbago?"

At this point she's starting to shake a little with laughter.

"But it wouldn't stop there. I'd just be in the kitchen all day, eating exquisite food while thumbing through the Secret President Book, looking at Roswell and the JFK stuff and going, 'Oh Man, I'm so hungry right now! Oh God, First food, I love it!"

That's when she cracks up.

In order to better understand this fascination, you must know this. Whenever I watch a show or movie where characters are being very technological, like finding fingerprints, blood, using machines to conduct tests or build robots, it always gets me hungry. I dunno what it is, but I always have my mouth watering when someone talks of Micro-chips or Micro-film or secret documents or a Super computer. Maybe I have a computer virus. Maybe even a Megabyte. Who knows?

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